This is The Time for This.

Right, this has been gnawing on me for the last few weeks and it’s time it should be said.

I’m pretty sure that I’ve hit some form of depression.

Nothing in my life right now as it currently stands is how I want it to be. I live in an acrimonious household with way too many people, I work a dead-end, soul-destroying job that eats up all my time and that I actually despise, my wonderful girlfriend is now my wonderfully better-off ex, I have had no positive responses for work experience and I am just stuck. Straight out of university into a rut as deep as hell.

To be honest it’s mainly my ex. She has really fucked me up but only because I loved her so much. Like honestly, it’s crazy, wild, uncontrollable, unrestrained, full-on, 100% love. It’s like fucking torture. Fuck that, it IS torture.

I’m crying daily and I just can not move on. I’m consistently ill and not eating. Something needs to change. And that is why I’ve decided to go see some ‘professional’ about it. I didn’t see it getting this bad.

I wrote this just in case that if anyone happens to come across it will realise why I’m being such a miserable motherfucker.



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