The Modern Hunt

The hunt for jobs. In this climate it is hard. Damn hard. Thankfully, I have a job already. Thing is though that is really quite shitty now. Work environment is poor, pay is poor and it’s difficult to get to (as I don’t drive). Further more I have to work awkward hours. Waiting half a day, doing fuck all because you know you have work at 5 sucks.  I know, I know sounds ungrateful sure but it really is not worth it. You guys are going to have to trust me on this.

So…..the hunt has begun. That is what it is nowadays; a hunt. You have to scour the landscape; digitally and for real for cards stuck in windows for mediocre jobs that are going to pay for your lifestyle. And fucking christ is it a minefield of shitty disappointments and knock-backs. Here are a short list of the stupid ass reasons:

1. Experience. Where is it?

Want to work in Retail? Where’s your experience? Want to bake a fucking cake? Where’s you GODDAMN EXPERIENCE! Apparently they want people who have:

a) been born with the innate experience of where they are working now.

I was born with the ability to make donuts in my FUCKING sleep!

b) got a job off a friend who already works there (I’m pretty sure this is how 999.8% of people get hired).

c) you did work experience there back in the merry old days of being sixteen where money was spent on nothing but fun.

It’s one of the things I’ve always thought was ridiculous. How can you get experience in the job without being given the opportunity to have a go at the job? It’s like when the bank charges you for having no money, when you have no money. You’re my bank, you can clearly see I have no money but yet still charge me £30 for having NO MONEY. What fucking logic is that?!? Maybe they aren’t related but it still does my tits in.

You know you'd do it better

2. Overqualified

“You want to work here?!  Sorry but you’ll just here until another better job comes along so we aren’t going to waste our time.”

For fuck’s sake! If I applied for the job, it’s because I want the job. And of course I’m going to leave if another job comes up because if it does it would be because I APPLIED FOR THAT AS WELL! Jesus.

3. Under qualified!

There are so many associate/assistant/executive/young/bullshit managerial jobs going around in my area at the moment, but relating back to the first post we can see the problem: no experience. Of all the problems listed this is the one that I can actually genuinely agree with. I wouldn’t let my business into the hands of someone without experience…..but shit, when are some people going to get some fucking breaks? Hypocritical I know but I’m kind of in a rant. We’ll let this one slide for now.

There are so many reasons I am angry at job hunting. I’m not an idiot. I know how to do shit. I have a pretty decent CV, if I do say so myself. I have all major qualifications from school and a bloody degree, I know how to learn and adapt and FUCKING WORK! But then you apply to about fifteen stores; 3 get back to you, none of the others do; and what’s shittier is you go past the same shops everyday and you STILL see them looking for staff! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME! I’ll work right now goddamnit! Shit.

And the worse fucking part; THE WORST fucking part is………None of these jobs are related to the industry I want to be in.

And why do you think I can find a job in the industry?


I can’t work for free. I have a house and bills to pay for. I need to eat. So how the FUCK do they expect me to get experience there?!

Fuck it. Let’s all just get credit card’s max them out and kill ourselves.


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